


Everything Hurts

by insomnia_writer



Category: Falsettos - Lapine/Finn
Genre: Angst, Death, Falsettos - Freeform, Hospitals, Love, M/M, Pain, Regret, Whizzers last moments, awkward father son relationship - Freeform, i apologize in advanced, oh boy, they both suck at communication, this is angsty
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-14
Updated: 2017-08-14
Packaged: 2018-12-15 02:55:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,660
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11796951
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/insomnia_writer/pseuds/insomnia_writer
Summary: What if Whizzer never went to Jason's baseball game? What if the first time that Marvin even sees Whizzer since their break up is when he's on his deathbed?





	Everything Hurts

**Author's Note:**

> My first shot at falsettos fanfic! I live off of attention so comments are appreciated.

“I feel fine. I was wearing a helmet” Jason groaned from the back seat of the car which Marvin was driving, hands gripping the steering wheel far too tightly for his own good. “I know you’re fine but this is my weekend and if I drop you back off at your mothers house with a concussion she is going to be the exact opposite of happy. We are just going to go, get you checked out, confirm that you’re fine, and then never tell your mother this happened”.

They pulled into the hospital parking lot and walked through the large automatic doors, cold air hitting them both immediately and Jason regretted not grabbing his jacket when they left the car. The third floor west wing was home to Urgent care, their destination. The waiting room was packed with different people, all with various states of injuries and Marvin and Jason took a seat, silence awkwardly suffocating them. Ever since Marvin slapped Trina, Jason hasn’t really been very talkative, not that anyone could blame him. The clock ticked by slowly, people came and left the small room, and eventually a young, tired looking nurse called out “Jason” to which Marvin quickly stood up out of his chair and pulled his son along. They weren’t given their own room seeing as Jason’s injury was not too severe, instead they were dragged into another hallway where long curtains hung between gurneys to provide the illusion of privacy. Jason sat down on the bed and Marvin stepped back to give the doctor space.

He was mentally chastising himself for letting Jason get hurt, when a door opened from the left and a doctor and nurse began to walk down the hallway side by side. It was made evident by their different colored scrubs that they were not from the Urgent Care, but rather the ICU which resided on the East Wing of this floor. “Heidi, can you go find Dr. Jones and ask her if they have any more morphine on hand? Brown only has a few more hours max and he is going to need as many painkillers as we can get in him” The doctor instructed and for a moment, Marvin’s heart jumped. Of course, it was probably nothing, there were millions of people with the surname Brown, but only one that he cared about. “Not to sound cruel but this man was brought in here three weeks ago and has not had a single visitor. He’s got no family, no nothing. There is no way he will be able to pay these bills and with no one else to pick up the tab… can the hospital afford to give out free morphine?”. Before the doctor could answer they had both turned the corner and were out of earshot. Marvin had to find this guy, just to prove to himself that it was most definitely not Whizzer.

Jason interrupted Marvin’s thoughts when he cleared his throat, standing up off of the bed “nothing’s wrong with me” he spoke almost proudly, as though he had somehow contributed to this good health. “Yeah, great. Look, go down to the store on the first store and walk around. Buy yourself anything you want. I’ll be down in a minute; I just need to go check something out”. Before Jason could even ask a question Marvin was through the door that the doctors had come from, heading straight to the front desk of the ICU.

The women behind the desk was quite beautiful but still somber looking, although it is hard to remain cheerful while working in such a horrid place. The people in the waiting room all seemed to be close to dying themselves, some crying into their sleeves, others with deep bags under their eyes as dark as the night itself. “I-- I’m looking for Whizzer Brown. Is there anyone in here with that name?” The nurse’s eyes widen a bit and she nods, and Marvin’s heart practically falls out of his chest onto the floor “Look I know it isn’t protocol to let anybody but family see the patients in here but--” The nurse cuts him off “Mr. Brown was checked in three weeks ago and hasn’t had a single visitor since, he does not have much time left, he deserves to know that someone cares. He is a good man. Protocol be damned. Down that hall, third door to your left. He may be sleeping but he never stays asleep long. Just wait it out”. Marvin thanked her quickly and raced down the hall, counting doors: one, two, three. He took a deep breath and opened the third door to his left, not at all prepared for the sight in front of him. It was Whizzer, his Whizzer, but had his name not been on the door, Marvin would have thought that this was a different man completely. He had lost at least fifty pounds, body frail and facial features sunk in. He was in these hideous hospital clothes, so grey and bleak that they looked about as dead as he did. And his eyes, oh those eyes, they were broken. Marvin could remember a time when those very eyes would look at him during a game of racquetball with this sense of hope and challenge, or when they would be in the middle of sex and their eyes would meet just for a second and Whizzer looked so trusting and vulnerable. All of that was gone now.

Marvin took a shaky step into the room and Whizzer’s head snapped to his direction, and there was a heavy moment of nothing, high tensions all around. Marvin knew he was supposed to be fine. He didn’t love Whizzer. He hated Whizzer. Whizzer was a dick. Right? If any of that was true why did every second that pass by hurt like a knife to the chest. “Marv… you’re here” Whizzer broke the silence and the hopelessness in his voice said everything that his words could not. They fell back into silence and Marvin took this as his turn to speak. “You look like shit” he chuckled warmly, sitting down on the stool next to the hospital bed and taking off Whizzers beanie so that he could run one hand through his hair like he used to every night before bed. “Don’t remind me. I’m dying and they won’t even let me wear my own clothes” Whizzer gave a sad attempt at a laugh but it sounded more pained than anything. His head dropped softly and his eyebrows furrowed, whispering “I’m dying” again as though he was only now realizing the fact. “I don’t want to die Marvin. I-- I love you. I should have told you before but I was too scared to. I was too scared to let you know. I’m sorry. I don’t want to die” his heart rate sped up for a second as he began to panic and Marvin just sat there, unsure of what to say because oh god Whizzer just admitted that he loved him. “Hey, don’t worry, don’t be scared. I’m here. I love you too. I’m not going to let anything happen to you” Marvin cooed gently, pulling away just for a second so that he could climb next to Whizzer in the bed, allowing the delicate man to curl up next to him and burry his face in Marvin’s chest. What a way to realize that you’re in love with someone, while they’re dying. “I’m not ready to die Marvin. Please. Don’t let me die. I have so much I have to do. I still need to see the world. I need to apologize to my dad. I need to-- I need” before the sentence could finish, Whizzer began to cry. He let out a loud, hiccupping sob, one that echoed off the walls of the bright white room and hit their ears a million times louder every second.

Marvin had never seen him cry before.

“Don’t worry about that Whiz, I’m right here. You’re going to get through this. I promise. I’m sorry for everything I did, everything I said. You’re so great. You are so beautiful and smart. I know you don’t think that you’re smart but you are. But most importantly you’re strong. You’re the strongest man I have ever met. You’ll beat this”. Marvin closed his eyes and did his best to pretend that they weren’t in a hospital. They were at home, their home. They never split up. Whizzer wasn’t sick. He pretended the heart monitor was just an alarm clock that they were both too lazy to turn off. “Everything hurts” Whizzer choked out and the pure anguish in those two words broke Marvin down in a way he didn’t think was even possible. “I know; I know it hurts. It’s going to be okay. Just relax. I’m here. Just breathe for me”. Sure enough, like the good, eager to please boy Whizzer always was, he followed instructions and focused on trying to breathe, on calming himself down.

Marvin held him tighter than he had ever held anyone before, as though he would be able to put back together all these broken pieces of his once perfect boyfriend. Whizzer stopped crying after several minutes, the small fit clearly taking a toll on his body as now his breathing was so much slower than it was before. “Everything hurts” Whizzer repeated, as though Marvin had forgotten, to which Marvin just held his eyes closed even tighter and kissed the top of his head “I love you”. There was a moment where all that could be heard was the steady beeping on the heart monitor and all that could be felt was the rise and fall of Whizzer’s chest. But then the rise and fall stopped, and the beeping turned to one long flat line, and all that was left was Marvin, holding the corpse of his sweet, sweet Whizzer.


End file.
